mean match

*a little preface to this post - i actually let this sit unpublished for a few days bc i thought it was not nice to be ranting about this person. maybe she was just having a bad day/week/whathaveyou. she cant be mean ALL the time. well, that bitch is a just that, a bitch, and well, every word you are about to read is true true tuh-rue. bitch needs to get that stick outta her ass and into her p-hole stat! ima puttin my foot down, while using the other foot to beat her ass! enjoy the post.*

im not talking about a couple. im talking about fear and respect. why do those things have to go together? (to the tune of yellow submarine) why do i live with a crazy psycho bitch. a mean psycho bitch. a mis-er-a-ble bitch. i really do live by the whole 'treat people like you would want to be treated' mantra so i try to be nice to everyone. even when theyre throwing verbal daggers at me, i still try and keep myself calm and collected. last night baffled me though.

actually had a nice dinner with the live in sib before i made my way out to the bk to see my bf. i consoled her as she was contemplating what to do with her life. she loves her job but hates the pay. plus, her one true friend decided to move back home to tennessee, this news came to her right after dee bawled her out telling her she will live and die alone with the 'tude she has. even though i was still kinda reeling over the last two nights bc her 'tude hurt my feelings, i put my qualms aside and instead aided my sib. actually left the apt not hating le join. when i got to bk, i called up le join and after what i thought was a pleasant and quick call, bitch hangs up on me. such a pet peeve of mine. why? bc its so damn disrespectful.

then, then, i come home during lunch today to find yet another dirty shirt of hers on my bed. i say another dirty shirt bc its not the first time this has happened. oh man. her reactions will get your heads spinning and steaming. first time it happened, i threw the shirt back onto her bed bc its her shirt and crazy bitch yells at me!

crazy bitch: what are you doing?!
me: putting your shirt on your bed.
crazy bitch: i dont want that on my bed. its dirty.
me: well then what the hell is it doing on my bed?
crazy bitch: youre never home anyway so who cares what goes there.

bitch. bitch. bitch. miserable bitch. bitch also crashes on my bed when shes in dirty clothes. meanwhile, her bed doesnt even have sheets on it and her comforter is crustomatic. plus, her dog sleeps with her in her bed. dog hair and bone crumbs. but yeah, my beds the nasty one thats ok to throw dirty clothes on. the bed that gets slept in maybe once a week. yeah, that makes sense. the lb says i should just throw her clothes in the garbage the next time she does it. dee agrees. i just dont have the heart to do it though. am i too nice?

dee im-ed me today and it really got me thinking:
dee: you've told her several times not to do it
dee: and still she does it and then YELLS at you when you correct it
dee: this is unacceptable in my eyes
dee: she does not fear or respect you
dee: she really doesnt with me either but definitely more with me and even rich than you
dee: hence her reaction to this entire sitch
dee: and the way she bad mouths you in front of your bf
dee: unacceptable

oh yeah, i dont think i mentioned the last thing here yet on this lovely blog aka rant-o-sphere of mine. basically, i had the lb over for some dinner and dexter a few weeks ago. i was wearing a cute skirt bc im a cute girl and le join goes something like, "if that skirt were any shorter, you could catch something." or something nasty to that effect. well, then the lb goes, "i like the way she dresses... you know, you just need to get laid." my man was just sticking up for me (its part of the bf contract) but that last line (although its true) really hit le join the wrong way. it was kinda nasty and yes, he did cross the line but le join started the whole schpiel and caused him to pull out the big guns.

anyway, what got me thinking was the fear and respect line. do i have to be scary to be respected? why cant i be nice and still get respect? does nice = weak? i really dont like treating people badly. i cant even watch people getting treated like shit. it hurts my heart. but is that what i have to do in order to not get stomped on by that heavy bitchy sister of mine? also, i cant be mean when someone is being nice to me, even if they really hurt my feelings the day before. am i weak? am i sensitive? am i just stoned? hehe. i wish!

actually the end of those days has begun. the lb and i finished the last of the stash. goodbye green, hello gym. sure, itll be a tough withdrawal, but at least ill look smokin' hot with tight abs and all. mama is gonna look f.i.n.e. for anguilla. hooray for beaches in december!