Thursday, March 08, 2007

maj-erly advice

ok, so i dont have the best relationship with my folks but i think weve been on a pretty good track lately. i dont tell them every little detail of my life but i send them major bullet points of whats goin on. so the maj and faj know about the btj. they dont know much about him but they know hes a friend of mine. i never divulged in any details however as le join would always tell me, "a mother knows when her chickens been plucked." im sure theyre dying to meet him but i never wanted that to happen bc how would the intro go: maj, faj meet my bowflex, my alternative to the gym, hes also my tokin' buddy too. even the brosef was like, i dont wanna meet your f#$% buddy.

anyway, dee was having probs with her bf earlier this week and well, i guess her domestic probs got the maj thinking about my "love life" and caused her to call me up and give some maj-erly advice. woman basically told me that at my age, i should be dating around and not settling down so if im not gonna marry this kid (the btj) than i should cut him loose. done and done. not that easy. its hard to leave someone or something when theres nothing wrong or bad about it. also, im speaking on behalf of my defense, its not like ive been ignoring other opportunities. i just didnt have any other outlets available.

just when i was getting comfortable with the btj, the maj has to spring this thought evoking advice on me. the wheels in my head wouldnt stop turning and my feelings started to surface. i got a little upset at the thought of not hanging out with him. yikes. but then, something miraculous happened, a potential, thats right potential suitor, wrote me from match. i wrote him back and im waiting for a response. hope i get one. after that one, two more people wrote me although i wont be responding back bc theyre gross and im picky. anyway, the good thing is, my match stock is goin up. miraculous coincidence or does the maj have a superpower over my life that i dont know about?

anyway, the thought of the end of my relationship with the btj still makes me sad. not saying its gonna end tomorrow. it probably wont end for a long time. probably til one of us finds another. that time will eventually come, i just didnt think about when it would and how it would be when it does. living in the now is so much fun. it has a great ignorant bliss feel to it but is that a good way to live? what is the right way to live? do i want to do whats right or whats fun? i know my clock is ticking but i feel like i just started playing.

special mention:
kelly taylor = worst person ever!!!


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