Thursday, February 02, 2006

wanted: s.w.m w/tivo or dvr

after talking to one friend about her new relationship with her boyfriend and having dinner with another friend whos dating her high school sweetheart, it totally hit me that i want to stop searching. i wanna just finally have a boyfriend because then, i can stop going out. lets face it, i dont love going out to the bars. we all know im not a huge drinker and im also a cheap ho that would rather spend $10 on a six pack of amstel and chill in an apt instead of $6 for a bottle and stand in a noisy bar.

the damn noise. going out is all about meeting people but how can you get to know someone if you can barely hear what their names are. and its already hard for me to have a conversation with anyone in a crowded bar because im usually getting nauseous from the two beers ive had mixed with the sweaty heat from the packed bar. awesome.

so thats its. im sick of being tired from spending my late nights out and waking up alone. dont get me wrong, i love my friends. i love hanging out with them and just plain old spending time with them. im such a lucky girl because i have these amazing people in my life. but even so, this hot mama aint gettin' any.

im not asking for a prince charming. please. i dont want to meet the one right now. that would suck because then i would feel compelled to marry him. you never let the one slip away. nah. i thought i wanted my 20s to be a skankass ho and run rampant around the city but i didnt expect to get so tired. to not be able to go out every night of the weekend because it wears down my bod. and also, i didnt expect people to be so ugly. seriously, i havent really seen anyone im even slightly attracted to in months. sad. makes me so sad.

so thats it. im lowering my standards a bit. ive got to. and since i just want someone to chill with for the time being, i should lower my standards. this is basically what i would want with my "just for a while" boyfriend: tivo, sex, pot. not in any particular order but now that im looking at it, that looks about right. in that order, or another order, or even some at the same time. whatever. tall funny guy with tivo and who either smokes or doesnt mind that i do... a lot. if you know of anyone who fits that description, send him on my way. or just send me the addy to his apt, ill go there. with a six pack of amstel and a dutchie.

special mention message to jamie: heres a vid to start your day with a fun bust out!


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