its about to be a... girlfight

i think all weekends should be three days long and should end with a fabulous ep of the 'guna! seriously, i always end up yelling, "B-E-S-T show EVER!!!" 10:30 pm monday nights. no joke. i love it too much. so i thought this ep would be filled with jessica whining about missing jason and jason engaging in a scandalous relationship with alex only a few days (or it could be hours, they never specified when exactly they got together) after he dumped her annoying ass. i knew that lcs reaction to talan telling her that "her" stephen actually spent his valentines day having dinner with kristin (who ordered lobster! milk it you ho!) would be great but there were so many layers to the ep that we could call it a bloomin' onion from outback. yum!

lc - "the only time we left the cabin was to go to the jacuzzi." wow. that is exactly how i wouldve spent a weekend in the snow too. awesome. the other reason to leave the cabin - to meet talan for lunch. yeah. those would be the only two reasons for me to leave too: the jacuzzi and to eat. especially with the yummy talan! seriously, heres a gratuitous shot of the boy who became a hot man in a span of a semester:

why am i pining for a kid who can get me arrested for statutory rape? this show is more dangerous than i thought it was. anyway, their lunch was when talan dropped the v-day bomb on lc. after she happily but slightly wearily remembered stephen bringing flowers and chocolates to her a mere hour before he was on his way back to san fran, talan told the blonde beauty that mr cheekbones had valentines day dinner the night before with kristin. haha! lc loses again. it definitely hit her who stephens ultimate choice is but you know as soon as that bastard even glances at her, shes a gonna come a runnin. oh that girl. love is blind.

speaking of blind - poor stephen. hes got the hottest bitch ever (lc) following after him like a lost puppy dog and he chases after a bitch who won't even stop cleaning her room (in her vacation condo no less) to speak to him for two seconds (can you be any bitchier, kristin). watching him beg her to come visit him up in san fran was just cringe-inducing. have you no pride boy?! even after a lobster dinner, all she gave you was a "pffht yeah" answer to a san francisco treat/trip. give it up son.

jessica. her skull is much thicker than stephens. must be made outta the bulletproof stuff. nothing gets in man. nothing. so jason finally got the balls to dump her ass so of course she plays the "i need tremendous amounts of sympathy" card with a little "im gonna go away and forget about him" in the mix. idiot. the girl is glued to her phone waiting for her ex to call while hes making out with his new girlfriend. oh jessica. she played the dumb dumpee in this ep but once she gets a whiff of jasons new relationship, her fighting claws come out. meeeeeeoooooowwwwwwww!!!!!

i really honestly thought i would hate alex in this ep and wanna cut this bitch out. seriously. let me spell it out for ya: R-E-B-O-U-N-D. i wouldve done the whole cheer for ya last week but after watching even the first 7 minutes of this ep, i knew alex wasnt the rebound chick but the one jason really wants. yeah. i finally think he has a functioning brain and even more, a heart. a heart with feelings. feelings for jessicas arch nemesis alex. man i love this show!

what made it even more valid was watching jason with alex. so so so different, polar opposite even, to how he was with jessica. he actually smiled. and a lot. who knew there was teeth behind his facial hair (i swear the kid has got to be a narc). his answer to why he smiles so much, "you" (to alex). who knew he had a mushy side? heres some old school pics of the happy couple courtesy of one of my new fave bloggers jewkakke.

youd think itd be all roses now for our bearded high schooler and his new girl but when youve got a psycho ex like jessica, rosy aint the way your life is gonna be. next ep is gonna be crazy and i cant wait. who knew jessica was a fighter. trying to win back jason the only way she knows how - by calling him nonstop and making a move when she can. love it! but we all know alex. we know shes a fighter too. can you hear the brooke valentine music or what?

this kinda makes me mad too. the googly side of jason isnt real? is he really just the sleaze bag we always saw him to be. im guessing yes because deep down i think hes a 35 year old posing as a 17 year old kid to get some high school ass. ridiculous!

kristin. what games will you be playing in laguna and with us next week? i think she was flirting with talan during their weekend in the snow because he was cuter than that other guy they went with and you know shes always gotta have some attainable salami at all times. even if she isnt having any. she just likes to know its there. at her disposable. gotta love a smart bitch like kristin.

on a side note - even though alex couldve gotten jason with a quasimodo size hump on her back, i think her dear friend casey went that extra special mile to make sure her friend claimed the man of her dreams. ive got a funny feeling casey gave jasons good friend and sidekick cedric and lickin' down under to ensure that jason realizes he is unhappy with jessica and would be much happier with alex. i dont know. cedric and casey just seemed way too happy that those two were finally together. hmmmm. makes you wonder dont it.